"I won't loose my place in life, I've been here too long and I've spent too much time"
Currently Listening To: These Walls from the album "Trapt" by Trapt
During this whole ordeal I've looked to a lot of places for comfort, particularly music which has often provided such comfort and I've finally found some that does. Ironically its the stuff I found all that time ago in April (I think, I'll have to check my blogg archives, might have been May) - Trapt. Since I basically spent all my live long day with my mates pimping the band to them everyone I know listens to them, my job was well done :) Now it seems sort of fitting that in a time where things are quite immensely shitty for me the music should sort of pay it back to me. Heh, sounds like a kinda stupid thing to say but there you go, eloquence is not a virtue I prize as highly as normal, given my current situation.
Gee.. The speakers in my mac, in fact just the speaker given there is only one, is really quite fantastically clear. I mean sure I knew it was H&K but I had no idea that it was so clear. Odd huh? And its most likely because the tower normally sits below my desk, a crime I might add given the sheer beauty of it. I'm wondering as to whether I should take some speakers to University with me, see I used to plug it into my HiFi which had a really nice sound to it but I have since donated it to my sister for its MD writing ability along with the MD player I had in Hong Kong.
I spent most of the afternoon, indeed all of it, probably up to 3 hours talking with my dad I came to realize in my mind that through all of her troubles my mother has sort of dehumanized him in some way, not done maliciously but driven by the same demons that plague her today. If anything good has come out of this whole situation it is that I have bonded better with my father and understood him for the person that he is. In turn he's helped me understand who my mother is. I have a greater admiration for him than ever and in turn a certain degree of disdain for a lot of people who portrayed him in a certain manner. Manipulation is something I can't abide and I shall make it my personal prerogative to ensure none of my siblings are subject to it as we have been in the past from people outside our family.
Right.. Now back to some sitting around on MSN/iChat/IRC
Later
John
Posted by John Swaine at September 4, 2003 07:51 PM